Sugar Pill? No Please!

Okay, I've never had an iPod...shocking. While I was creating my name in it I literally had to double check that it is "iPod" and not "iPOD". Yeah, I'm bad. What can I say? I love my music; I like to feel like I created a classic playlist for every season , mood, emotion, anything. My MP3s did that for me. However, I was threatened by the best of the best, RS.Dot, LD, and MK. 3 of the greatest friends in the whole world, btdubs. They told me 2011 I have to get an iPod or they were done. Anyway, LD was nice enough to let me use her old iTouch until I got one of my own. To say that this transition has been a hot mess is like saying The Dark Side of the Moon has "OK" record sales :-/

But alas, I have survived. I got an FM transmitter so I can play it all day long. And boy do I love it. My friends knew that a music fiend, such as myself, needs an easier means of finding a song, besides looking through the 50-some odd labeled CDs. I'm literally addicted to Amazon.com to buy music. And now that my iTunes finally works, I'm hooked to the store as well.

ANYWAYS...
Now that I can listen to anything I want at any time, life has been so much better. I've listened to throwback jams like Night and Day by Al B. Sure. Love that song. "I can tell you how I feel about you night and day." Now that's a man. No matter what day, you will always know that I love you, I'll always let you know because it will always be the same. DOIN IT! Us 80s babies know all about those incredible love songs. But there's a song I found that warmed my heart and has so much meaning to me now than it ever did.

Polaris by Jimmy Eat World. WOW! That song did it for me tonight. After a night of reminiscing with Day, one of my main ride or dies, I wanted to listen to an oldie but goodie. I stumbled upon Jimmy in the list of artists and saw Polaris and was like yes. This song is so good I'm going to paste the lyrics below in this post.

In this song, it seems as if him and his lover have gone through a rough patch. He tells her he's "traveled east and north." He speaks of mistakes that he knows he's made and that he's "always been afraid." The meaning behind that is he knows he F**KED up. Plain and quite simple. It also seems as if he needed time to go and experience, learn and MAKE MISTAKES. If you do not grow as individuals you will never grow together.

He says to her, "I feel like when I'm old, I'll look at you and I'll know this world was beautiful." What? Who says that? That is by far one of the most amazing lines I've ever heard in a song. To be able to judge the outcome of your time on Earth, simply on the fact that you spent your life with this particular person, puts me in a permanent state of awe. That is incredible. I would literally faint, wake up and propose to the man who ever said that and truly meant it.
Basically, when he comes to her and says all these things he asks, "Can you tell me?" and she responds, "You say that love goes anywhere? In your darkest times, it's just enough to know it's there. When you go, I'll let you be. But you're killing everything in me." Powerful words right there. Again, another song we can all relate to ladies. She telling him she's going to stick by him and she'll always be there and every time he walks out the door, she's going to let him leave but it will break her soul.

And then you hear the bridge and everything seems to be in perspective.
"I'm done, there's nothing left to show. I try but I can't let it do. Are you happy where you're standing still? Do you really want the sugar pill? I'll wake up tomorrow and I'll start. Tonight it feels so hard." It appears that he's done everything possible to make this work. He knows he messed up but as much work that has been put in, it just isn't enough to keep the blood flowing. She makes it harder and harder for him to leave but letting him know that she's going to appear to be strong about this but on the inside her heart in tearing apart.
A serious question, does anyone really want the Sugar Pill? Do you want it to be forced and fake? Some people do just for fear of loneliness or never finding someone ever again. I could never live like this. I want it all, the good,the bad and the ugly. I want the real deal people. Call me naive but I'm a realest. Real love exists and I know it is on its way. That's why I was put here, to love and be loved by friends, family and a true love.

That is one of my particular interpretations. But, how it relates to me is by taking the song in a more literal sense. Long story short, aka I'm not trying to tell you all of my business; you remember sometimes I can be somewhat cryptic, sorry, but private is private. Anyway, again, long story short, for my personal situation, I see it as a girl saying goodbye. She promises to be strong, which she is, but inside she cannot help to feel as if something is missing. When I say to myself, "Am I only dreaming?", it's because I'm usually day dreaming ha. But in a perfect world, during this time apart, we grew, learned, and made mistakes as individuals. Hopefully in the future, if he asks me to "Please answer the door", I'll ask him if love really does go anywhere and in your blackest of holes, did you know it always with you? I let you go as soon as you left, but I never let go of hope. That is the one thing that keeps anyone's dreams or expectations alive, no matter the outcome. But for myself, I'll say this, I sincerely believe that in matters of love and your OWN heart, hope for the best and prepare for the worst. I'm Ready!

A Great Love Throwback: Say Yes (Timbaland Remix) by Floetry
Another great song of Adoration: Nicest Thing by Kate Nash

Polaris- Jimmy Eat World
(taken from www.sing365.com)

I'll say it straight and plain
I know I've made mistakes
I've always been afraid
I've always been afraid

A thousand nights or more
I travel east and north
Please answer the door

Can you tell me
You say that love goes anywhere
In your darkest time, it's just enough to know it's there
When you go, I'll let you be
But you're killing everything in me

Get down on your knees
Whisper what I need
Something pretty
Something pretty

I feel that when I'm old
I'll look at you and know
The world was beautiful

Then you tell me...
You say that love goes anywhere
In your darkest time, it's just enough to know it's there
When you go, I'll let you be
But you're killing everything in me

I'm done, there's nothing left to show
I try but can't let it go
Are you happy where you're standing still?
Do you really want the sugar pill?
I'll wake up tomorrow and I'll start
Tonight it feels so hard
As the train approaches Gare Du Nord
As I'm sure your kiss remains employed
Am I only dreaming?

You say that love goes anywhere
In your darkest time, it's just enough to know it's there
When you go, I'll let you be
But you're killing everything in me

When you go, I'll let you be
But you're killing everything in me

Month of Love (for most Month of YUCK)

Oh Hey Guys,

Sorry I've been slacking so hard. I've been busy. Let's be real, not at all. I've been bum life so hard these days. I'm a waitress with my MBA...cool?!? What can you do? I've been thinking about that. Most people say when you want things done you gotta do it yourself. I'm going to work on that. I would love to start my own Management and Event company. That would be sweet. I really just want to work in the music business. I love my job but I do not want to be a professional waitress. However, my restaurant is awesome and is definitely the perfect means to an end. I want to be out of the House of the Rents by summer so this job will help.

Anyway, let's talk music. It is the season of love. So there are a lot of great songs out there. I hate songs like Olivia Newton John's I Love You. Yuck! Songs like that are awful.  Well I'm actually watching Conan right now and Ray Lamontagne is performing. Ah, his voice.  Now a great V-Day song by him is Shelter. So pretty and his voice is so powerful and passionate that you cannot help but to fall in love with anything that exits his mouth. Another great love song is Sideways by Citizen Cope and Santana. It's a song all about feelings that never leave no matter how hard you try. Just because you forget about their existence, does not mean they are not still lingering in your heart. And the perfect song to remind your boo or booette that he or she is the only one is You Got Me by the Roots and Eykah Badu. Amazing. It's all about telling that person that no matter where I am or who I am with my heart is with you, YOU GOT ME!

Throughout the month I'll definitely be giving you some more love. I'm actually going through my own love trials and tribulations. Not at all. These issues seem to have been created within my own mind but that's okay. I've got so much love for "Zack Morris" but it's frustrating. The whole situation is so confusing and at times irritating, so much so that I try to avoid the issue in its entirety. But you cannot choose the way you feel. "Zack Morris" has been a tenant of my heart for years now and I know it will work itself out.

Ah, have you heard a name of the past and it just begins to haunt you? Like I said with the song Sideways, sometimes feelings hit you and will just never go away. You can run but you can't hide from those types of emotions. Reminds me of Usher's Throwback. But I'm only missing my Baby because I just remembered he actually existed, and not in a bad way. But when it hurts to think about them why think about them? Am I right?


And Maxwell, I LOVE This Woman's Work but really is it that hard on a man?!? And if you should be crying then just do it. Sorry Max, don't mean to hate on you I've just got some mixed emotions. Clearly, music is my boyfriend; sometimes we make love and sometimes war. Music is my lover and my scapegoat.


HAPPY BLACK HISTORY MONTH TO ALL OF MY PEEPS!!! Although we have the shortest month in the whole year (I WILL ALWAYS BE TIGHT ABOUT THAT), at least we have one. To all those who got me to where I am, RESPECT! I would love to Dedicate Brown Skin by India Arie to all my beautiful people.


Make sure you tell someone that you love them everyday this month. <3 and be <3'd


Love Song of the Day: You Should Be Here by Raphael Saadiq and D'Angelo
A Favorite: Killing Me Softly by Roberta Flak (but I <3 the Fugees' version)

Uh

I had a fabulous night. It was MK's 21st Bday. NYC...BOWERY...DOIN IT!
And after a night like tonight, having a calm connection with another individual, I often tend to go back to "Zack Morris"
Right now I'm lost as per usual. I'm not wasting or waiting; I'm just living.

Yea Yea, what the hell does this have to do with music, I know. But this is my place to be myself and what did I tell all of you in my first post? Music and My Life are one in the same. Why is that? Because I can literally place a song to every instance or emotion. And right now it's Chasing Pavements by Adele.
I'm flippin' lost and pretty much over it.
This is a very cryptic post and for that I apologize. I just needed an outlet and now that I have my blog this is it.

Up Next: 2010 Album Recaps (promise) and Weezy's interview with Rolling Stone...HILARIOUS BTDUBS

Night All

Today's Mood: Stunting Like My Daddy by Lil Wayne ft. Birdman
Current Mood: Oil and Water by Incubus (add Adele to this too)

Machine Gun Kelly=Necessity!

This dude is so dope. I wanna know more about him. I'm gonna do some research and get back to you. He is so good and his tats don't hurt his sex appeal. MGK is blonde, lanky, and his smile could make the common girl collapse. The way he rhymes is like no other. His swagger is official. Who would have thought some dude from Ohio could be that gully. Yo, every month it seems like I find a new favorite thing about the Midwest. There is something special in that water because the Midwest is on a f*n roll

Cleveland-MGK

BETTER AND BETTER

Sooo...I just read on Incubus' Facebook page that a new album is on it's way for 2011. Honestly, could this year get any better with music? I mean Incubus was the first concert I ever went to. I was 18 years old; yea I was late on the concert game, but they were the ones to open my eyes to a great show.  Now at 25 I've been to over 10 live shows and still remember Incubus as one of the greatest.  Brandon Boyd is one of those unique voices I discussed earlier. Not only is he incredibly attractive but his voice is beyond soothing. I do not necessarily hear pain in his voice but rather pure emotion and love.  He released a solo album in August 2010 called Wild Trapeze. I haven't really checked it out but it's probably intense and calming all at the same time. I'll get on that and let you know what I think.

DJ Kilmore is the man. He did a set in that concert and ripped it like no other DJ. A rock band that uses a dj is ingenious.  Make Yourself, is still one of the greatest albums in my book. The video to Drive got me to fall in love with Mr. Boyd and what a cool ass video huh.  And my fave mentioned in my other post I Miss You, came from that album as well as Pardon Me, both classics.  2001's Morning View, had one of my favorite tracks of all time, Warning. My girl MK's fave line is, "I suggest we learn to love ourselves before it's made illegal." What an awesome statement.  There is more meaning in that line than most thesis papers.  Ahhh and Aqueous Transmission is the most calming song of all time. Go get some candles, take a bath, throw that song on and just relax. Guarantee you've never have felt better.  Echo is such a pretty song and feels like the best pick up line ever.

Light Grenades is currently still stuck in my civic and cannot come out. I adore that album.  Dig and Oil and Water are by far the best songs on that album. BUT MY FAVORITE INCUBUS SONG IS...[drum roll please] SOUTHERN GIRL.  In all honesty it is up there with Breaking the Girl.  It is so mellow and beautiful and something I've always wanted to be told.  It reminds me of my ex-BF only because it was in my AIM profile when we dated.  But you see it was me saying it about him, not the other way around. My heart would flutter if someone were to say to me, "You're an exception to the rule. You're a bonafide rarity. You're all I ever wanted. Southern Girl, could you want me?" It's funny because I never felt that way about him but I loved that song so much and believed it to be the most enticing and endearing song at the time.  It's funny because someone basically said those lyrics to me, not in those words, but in his own.  And now when I think of this song I think of him.

Anyway...point being, Incubus popped my Concert Cherry.  They will always hold a very special place in my heart. Another great added to the list.

Oh so remember how I mentioned Britney had a new "song" out? I got my email update from Billboard and she made the top 100.  She actually is on top of the Top 100 at #1.  I think the song is not her best by any means. See I never said the song was not going to be hot, it clearly was and only because she's Britney 'Bitches".  Sad but oh so true. Go look up the song, it's called Hold it Against Me. Oh man.

Today's Mood: Sideways by Citizen Cope
A favorite: Shelter by Ray Lamontagne

HAD TO BE DONE

Okay so I was on HotNewHipHop.com where you can find the newest and best hip hop tracks around. To be honest it is usually only new for New Yorkers because for some reason we're the last to hear it. But at the same time it aint hot until we put it on the map...true story.

Anyway!

You gotta check out these new songs.  They were too good to keep to myself.

Beautiful People by Chris Brown produced by BENNY BENASSI...whattttttt?!?! <3 Benny

http://www.hotnewhiphop.com/en/play/s/40e9a76-166783/

My two boyfriends have come together to create magic..

Throwin Shots by Weezy and Wiz Khalifa

http://www.hotnewhiphop.com/en/play/s/d6126e5-166999/

(Saw Wiz last year with Girl Talk before he was famous and we definitely has eye relations the whole time. I was right in front. Those tats, that mouth, that voice, ah! Makes me wanna rep Steelers' colors (but I live in NY and I despise Ben Roethisberger..yuck)).

Faded by Red Cafe ft. Rick Ross is definitely gonna be hot this Winter, I feel it. That title did really well with Soul Decision in the 90s. Something about that word, it's too good.

http://www.hotnewhiphop.com/en/play/s/ee57c6b-166998/

Night N' Day by Weezy and Luda is hot. This is Southern and so gritty

http://www.hotnewhiphop.com/en/play/s/1fd06ef-168032/

There are some other good ones, even Britney's new one with Flo-Rida is on there. There is a reason I did not post that one on here. She's done. Sit down B. Spears, bow out semi-gracefully. But seriously check out the site's Top 100, there's a lot of good shit on there.

2011: Bringin' Music Back, YEA

I am so pumped about this year. The best of the best are finally coming back to where they belong, in the spotlight. No offense to J. Biebz, who I adamantly believe is one of the most talented new artists, but I am so tired of his prepubescent vocals. I miss the heart, soul and pain of yesteryear.

1st and foremost MY FAVORITE BAND IN THE WHOLE ENTIRE UNIVERSE is finally making another album. The RED HOT CHILI PEPPERS ARE BACK! No title or release date, to my knowledge, have been released. I just know that in this year I will be blasting a new RHCP album loud and proud. I have not been this excited in a very long time. This band has gone through so much since 1983; from the drugs to the variety of guitarists. A new (and young) guitarist, Josh Kinghoffer, is making his debut on the Red Hot's 10th album. At only 31 he has to prove himself to critics, but especially to die-hard fans like myself. I for one am beyond ecstatic either way. The minute the tour dates are released I am buying front row tickets. Anthony Kiedis was in fact my first celebrity crush.  More FUN FACTS about me, MY FAVORITE SONG EVER RECORDED is Breaking the Girl off of Blood Sugar Sex Magik. If you haven't heard it go to YOUTUBE ASAP! And while you're there check out TRISTAN CLOPET'S cover of it. That boy made me shed tears. Keep an eye and ear out for that talented young man, PLEASE! His EP Purple is the shit and is definitely a great addition to my online album collection. Also every time I've played Dani California on "Rock Band" I've gotten 100%, either on vocals or drums. And Porcelain off of Californication is the definition of the most beautiful lullaby I have ever heard. Not that it makes me sleepy but it speaks to my unconscious and reminds me that I am delicate and precious.

The next album I am definitely waiting for is the Foo Fighters. According to the November 25th issue of Rolling Stone, Dave Grohl, my favorite drummer next to Travis Barker, is reconnecting with his Nirvana Peeps, Butch Vig, producer, and Krist Novoselic, bassist. This will be the Fighters' 7th album and the 1st since the 2007 release of Echoes, Silence, Patience and Grace. If you're not amped about them getting a record together checkout my favorite Nirvana song Smells Like Teen Spirit. (Another Nirvana fave: Come as You Are). As for great Fighters' tracks Everlong (acoustic), Hero and Best of You. Oh and I say the acoustic version of Everlong because let's face it, it's always better acoustic. That is my opinion and I'm sticking to it. (Great example: Play both versions of Incubus' I Miss You and let me know, k thanks). And the words, ahh, "If everything could ever be this real forever. If anything could ever be this good again. The only thing I'll ever ask of you, you've gotta promise not to stop when I say when. She sang." I call Everlong my love song to music. For me music is REAL and GOOD and FOREVER. As for Best of You the line, "Were you born to resist or be abused? I swear I'll never give in, I refuse..." POWERFUL. And if you need me to explain Hero, just go rent Varsity Blues. That scene gets you so amped up it could possibly incite a riot...FACT!

The 3rd album I am anxiously awaiting is Carter IV.  I think that is a given for ummm, everyone. Lil Wayne has been around for a minute now. I remember being a senior in high school (2003, damn kid) and bumpin' Way of Life featuring Birdman and TQ (btdubs, what happened to that dude?). Weezy has clearly grown as an artist since that point. I don't care what anyone says, the Carter III was my jumpoff. DRAKE learned radio monopolization from 2008 Weezy. I still have that album in my car, going so hard. You Aint Got Nothing with Juelz Santana and Fabolous was my favorite. The lyrics, ahh a masterpiece of combination. I had the privilege of seeing Lil Wayne live in 2008 at Hot 97's Summer Jam about a week before his album's release. Okay, Pussy Monster for 15 minutes, enough said. And if right now you're like "What's Pussy Monster?" Immediately go to YOUTUBE. It is beyond raunchy but my goodness, YUMMY! Honestly, if RANSOM with him and DRAKE is any indication of what Carter IV is bringing to the table, I am so ready. I obviously purchased I am Not a Human Being, which was released while he was still in Prison. For me it was a great mixtape but definitely the calm before the storm.

My girl Adele. Now this girl has a voice on her that is so soulful that I wish I had another word to use besides soulful. Her new album entitled 21 is set to be released in February 2011. How appropriate because she is only 21. How crazy is that? For all my 21 and over people, think about what your 21st year of life was like and try and make a comparison because right now I feel ashamed. The first single off the album is called Rolling in the Deep. It is a great "WOMEN RULE" song.  The next single, out on the 24th of this month, is Someone Like You and it shivers my inner core. If that song does not immediately make you a fan, again go to YOUTUBE, which you probably already have open to use as a reference, and look up Melt My Heart to Stone. For every female out there these words have rang true at least once, "And I hear your words that I made up. You say my name like there could be an us. I best tidy up my head. I'm the only one in love..." WHAT? Oh you remember who he was ladies.

The last artist that I have to mention that brings pure excitement to my life is Lykke Li. This girl is so funky. And through her songs you can just tell that this girl knows what she wants, she is cool, calm and collected, and is a down ass chick. The instruments she chooses to use and the beats that are created are like no other and evoke a spirit that seemed to be lost inside your deepest self. Yea, it's like that. Her first single, Get Some, is pretty good. Not absolutely in love with it but I dig it. I prefer the remix with the coolest "Loser" ever, Beck.  It flows so much better. Her second single, I Follow Rivers, is really good. The sound is so speakeasy chill to me, underground and sensual. Her album Youth Novels was incredible. My boy Corey introduced me to her with the song Breaking it Up, which gives me the same vibe as I Follow Rivers. From the first time I listened to her I was infatuated with her sound and voice. There are several unique voices out right now, Adam Levine, Caleb Followill and hers are some of the best. Time Flies is my favorite song by her. To be honest it helps me cope with my own situation. Lykke Li proves her skill by remaining a dominant force on Gifted, the NASA track featuring Kanye West. If you can hold your own next to Kanye then you are no Miss Swift. Lykke Li is straight dope.

Several other artists are bringing it in 2011. For all those GaGa creepers she's coming back. Born this Way is on its way kids. I am not the biggest fan but I dig the shit out of her style. She's funky fresh. And I don't care what anyone says, I know there are many great Lady GaGa tracks but, I absolutely adore Love Game. Still gets me hyped in the club; let's be honest it would still get me hyped if I heard it in Forever 21. GaGa's last, Fame Monster opened me up to her a lot more so I think this album should be a good one. Chris Martin and his boys are back for album number 5. Violet Hills from Coldplay's 4th, Viva La Vida or Death and All His Friends, is a classic example of powerful poetry set to song. But my all time fave is Sparks from the 2000 album Parachutes. That song is a definitely in the running for possible wedding songs! For most it's get the boyfriend, get engaged, then choose a wedding song. Not this chick. Although not a huge fan, please don't tell, U2 is coming back as well this year. I don't dislike them but I never got into them. Sorry. But I do love Bono for all the good he does for this world.

And yes she's back again "Bitches!" Britney is making her way back. Her guest appearance on GLEE could not have been just that. I knew there was a PR tactic behind that one.

A band who made their 2009 debut is blowing up. Cage The Elephant needs to be experienced. To me they are a less R&B and more of a gritty local band version of Kings of Leon. Same Southern Swagger but younger and rawer. Their 2009 semi-hit, Aint No Rest for the Wicked, reminds me so much of Sublime it's scary. Their new album Thank-You Happy Birthday, out now, is worth giving a listen to. My fave is Indy Kidz. Although my clothing mostly consists of Free People and Urban Outfitters, I take the mockery and put it behind me because this song is the shit! Always Something is definitely very dark and dirty. And if you are a huge fan of KOL like myself, you will love Cage's song Flow. Southern and melodious.

Speaking of R&B, Jamie Fox just released an album called Best of My Life. Cannot lie, I haven't heard any of it yet except the single,  Fall For Your Type featuring DRAKE. This song gets an A+ in my gradebook. When Jamie is on he is on. You guys remember Neyo's She Got Her Own. Jamie killed it on that. This song reminds me of it because it is an ode to those rare specimen of women that usually get neglected; independent chicks like me and my girls that work, go to school, and take care of business. I digress, point is this new track is so delicious.

2010 was great do not get me wrong but 2011 will shock and awe. Sorry 2010 but the past was meant to get passed and excel beyond. Sometime this week I'll break down my faves of 2010, probably manana. We'll see. Honestly, there is no way we cannot discuss Pink Friday, My Dark Twisted Fantasy, Congratulations and Come Around Sundown. Ahh and I have to go over my new found love for The Black Keys and their newest album Brothers. And also why their drummer parties with Ke$ha :-/

Today's Mood: Imagine by John Lennon

Favorite Song of 2010: All I Want is You by Miguel ft. J. Cole (still going hard on my playlist)